Sunday, March 01, 2009

Our parting contestants will leave with a copy of the Paul Harvey Home Game!

A legend has died.

I know it's not hip for a man who has yet to have a prostate exam declare that he's a fan of Paul Harvey.

I'm not afraid to admit it. I love Paul Harvey.

As if declaring it wasn't proof enough, my buddy Troy Scott even got me an autographed Paul Harvey photo several years ago. It hangs in my home office today. How is that for street cred!
I have very fond memories of eating at Sticky's Restaurant in Dauphin, Manitoba, and when Paul Harvey's "The Rest of the Story" took over 730 CKDM's airwaves for 5 minutes every afternoon, a quiet hush would fall over the patrons. I once made a fool of myself by talking during a segment on Louis Pasteur, only to be told by an elderly person who smelled like mothballs to "SHUSH! Can't you hear that Paul Harvey's on! Have some respect!".

Paul Harvey's unique delivery was a breath of fresh air for me when I worked the midnight shift colouring comics at Digital Chameleon. Our shift worked midnight to 8:00. Paul Harvey's arrival at 6:00 AM every morning meant we were heading into the final lap of those grueling shifts.

If you're unfamiliar with Paul Harvey's gig, every day he'd weave a yarn over the airwaves, where he'd reveal... The Rest of the Story. While you're listening, you'd think you knew who he was talking about, until he got to the end and he'd hit you with what I liked to call the Paul Harvey Left Hook* - where he'd reveal that while you thought he was talking about Charles Shultz, it was in fact Sir Thomas Malory.

It was just that exciting.

To spice things up, we on the night shift came up with the Paul Harvey Home Game. The rules were simple.
  1. The first rule of the Paul Harvey Home Game is that you do not talk about the Paul Harvey Home game.
  2. You could guess who Paul Harvey's subject was going to be. (eg: Herbert Morrison)
  3. You could guess what Paul Harvey's subject was going to be. (eg: the bullet that killed Archduke Ferdinand)
  4. You could guess where the story took place - with bonus points if you get the era. (eg. 17th Century France)
  5. You could take a wild stab at what the opening line would be. (eg. These tended to be exceedingly obtuse. Paul Harvey could start a story about Vanna White with the following sentence: "'Seven half-shillings for that?!', exclaimed the young man at the boat's starboard edge, peering down the cutlass illuminated by the midnight sun..." - It was pretty much acknowledged that if anyone won on this rule, the game would pretty much be retired, and that person would be awarded Supreme Paul Harvey Home Game Champion.)
All guesses had to be in prior to 6:00 AM. I think my buddy Ian Sokoliwski once won by guessing that the story would revolve around a Spanish Galleon, but I can't remember the details. Other than that, no one ever won, but we did come up with some great people and things (and opening sentences) that WOULD have been great topics!

Rest in peace, Paul Harvey. I thank you for being the harbinger of daylight during those dark night shifts.

And if Sticky's Restaurant was still standing, there would be a moment of silence, during which patrons would apply Gold Bond's Itching Powder in reverence.

*CORRECTION: Both Ian and Christine, both regular contestants on the Paul Harvey Home Game, have noted that it was actually called the "Paul Harvey One-Two", not "Left Hook" as was originally stated. And now... YOU know... the REST.... of the story!

Currently playing: Toto - Africa
Currently colouring: Something for Dark Horse Comics, TBA.
Proudly in my third Cola free year!

4 comments:

Ian Sokoliwski said...

As I recall, Christine referred to it as the Paul Harvey one-two! which is still how I make reference to it whenever someone pulls the ol' switcheroo on someone.

And what about the fake-out episodes, where it was an eagle or the Blair Witch Project or something? I always felt cheated on those.

Troy Scott said...

I loved the Paul Harvey where he was talking about Nero playing the fiddle.
He knew a lot more details that history didn't pick up.
Know why?
CAUSE HE WAS THERE!!!!!!!

Donovan Yaciuk said...

Ian, you are indeed correct. It was "the Paul Harvey one-two"! Christine confirmed it earlier today!

Ian Sokoliwski said...

aw, jeez, playing around with the new Timeline feature on Facebook dropped me into this blog entry again - good times, good times.